Sometimes

I have this tendency to go into this autopilot mode, where I pretty much just go about life without really having any control over what I do. Especially if I am stressed out/ overloaded this switch just flips and boom autopilot on. Normally thats fine, but it actually made me mess up at work and now I sit here at home stressing about the new butthole I may get ripped tomorrow.

We get "mystery shopped" each month and we are graded on it. This month I caught when it was happenning and we knew to expect the results. Well....we bombed it. Hard. And all because I didn't make eye contact when I said thank you, I was mechanical in my orser taking, and had to take the order and hand it out so the service time was slow. Naturally Drive thru aced it, but lil ole me on front counter apparently is a failure. The sad thing is that I did my job, I just wasn't peppy enough and was focused on getting the customers (yeah the plural amount of them) taken care of so the guy docked me pointa for not spending longer on him.

*sigh*

This is doing nothing for my work stress. I'm trying so hard to make sure i'm doing a good job and not being emotional or overly stressed and now I'm literally being told I'm too...robotic and mechanical in my working. The one day I'm not myself and we get the mystery shopper. Hopefully the almost $300 hour with 4 people working will be in my favor, otherwise I'm pretty much screwed.

Whoever thinks fast food isn't a high stress job can kiss my butt. There's a lot more to it than just "flipping burgers" and people don't seem to realize that we have high standards of service placed upon us. I have NIGHTMARES about work a lot more than I am willing to admit. I know something has to change soon or I am going to break.

The automatic autopilot when I show up there has been an indicator to me for awhile, I just didn't realize that it was noticeable until now.

Lesson for the day: We are all seen through by someone, even when we think we aren't.