Angry for so long

I walked (and ran a little) to the Provo Temple today...took me two hours to get there and back...not bad really considering I spent some time at the temple itself. Pretty sure I wasn't walking that fast but I did get a workout so WOOHOO!!!! I figured out a lot while on that walk and while at the Temple...first I can't run very far because I am out of shape, two it is FREEZING and I will need to wear sweatpants next time, three the temple sure is open early because there was a ton of people going into the temple, four I pretty much love the temple, and five (the most important)

I have been angry for a long time, with myself and with Heavenly Father. I have been feeling so lost lately and angry and I didn't really realize that until I was at the temple talking t Him when suddenly the word angry popped out of my mouth and I started crying. Mainly I was crying because I was upset at the prompting I felt earlier. I didn't want t lose another friend like I basically lost the friend I had in Colton and I just don't want to be hurt again like with Jaren and Colton when I felt so strongly and the just...it wasn't the same with them. I also have been angry about my family and the hurt they went through when I joined the church. I have been angry about a lot of things that I didn't really realize until today and it was like once I acknowledged that anger this HUGE weight was lifted and I really felt this major calm come over me. I felt and feel ready to face whatever Heavenly Father has in store for me with an optimism like no other!

Proof that blessings come from visiting the temple...on the way back towards the apartment a whole TROOP of army hotties went running by and oh my word they were smoking hot! Every one of them and they were doing this chant thing with running and the drill sargeant guy worked in a "hello" for me! He said "Say hello to the pretty lady" and the rest of them said "Hello Pretty Lady."

I about fainted.